Egg drop

I think birds like to aim for cars when they poop. We’ve all experienced this at some point in our lives, but as I was heading home from school the other day, I stopped my car under a tree and… splat! A small cream-colored EGG dropped from the sky and smashed onto my windshield! What the blazes? I was stunned! Was this some kind of pigeon prank? (Hey Polly, betcha can’t hit that gold Toyota—first shot!) Or maybe accidents happen and Momma bird just missed the nest? Regardless, there was now a slimy yellow goop almost obstructing my vision, so what did I do? I turned on my windshield wipers. Seemed like a good idea at the time, but within 0.3 seconds that egg was smeared all over the glass. And what’s even more bizarre is that by the time I got home, the hot Texas sun had cooked it partway through, so I literally had to scrape a layer of sticky scrambled eggs off my windshield. [I almost put it on some toast and gave it to my roommate, but the dead bugs sprinkled throughout would have been a giveaway.] Slightly frustrating, but I have to admit, that was a really nice shot.

Geriatric selfie

One of my new goals is to teach my cute little Grandma how to take a selfie. Wait, let’s be real: a more accurate statement would be “teach, and then try to convince my Grandma to take a selfie.” This is a fairly ambitious goal for a granny who hates getting her picture taken, does not get along well with technology, and has no interest in social media—but wouldn’t that be awesome? Man on a mission.

**Update: Several weeks later, Grams agreed to give it a try as long as I'd stand next to her. Fair enough. Little did she know, I'd put the camera on burst mode so it would take a bunch of pics. I figured one of them was bound to work out. Well... the first ~20 looked like this:

But then the planets aligned! Proud of this spunky little lady. There you have it, my very own Grandma in the perfect geriatric selfie:

[Just don't tell her I posted this...]

Attack of the leftovers

(This is what the internet
says germs look like.)

I'm living proof that not all med students are germ-a-phobes. I’m a big believer in letting kids eat a little dirt, I view the "10 second rule" as merely a suggestion, and I'm not afraid to touch door handles with my bare hands. “It’s good for your immune system,” I always say. And it is. That being said, we had exam week at med school and then a short break for summer, so I was studying my brains out. I didn’t have a lot of time to cook, plus I wanted to eat all the stuff in my fridge so it wouldn’t go bad while I was gone. Great plan, except I ran out of real food the last couple days, and decided to just eat some leftovers I found in the depths of my fridge. I figured I’d just microwave them for a few extra minutes to kill off any lurking microbes. So I did… and got to spend the first two days of my vacation sick. But my immune system is relentless and eventually won the battle. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger—right? [Translation: the same thing will probably happen again next finals week, but this time my body will be ready.]

Autocorrect fitness feat

I sent a seemingly ordinary text the other day, only to find out afterwards that autocorrect struck again. Twice in the same message I meant to say "just visited" but my phone changed it to “deadlifted.” (They’re not even close on the keyboard?) Result: "It was a great weekend, I deadlifted an old roommate. I hear you deadlifted your family?" Total bewilderment.

Reminded me of a few days ago when autocorrect changed the name of my friend to "Rostropovich." Apparently my phone thinks I hang out with late Russian composers on a regular basis.